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What If You Couldn’t Turn It All Off?

October 27, 2016 by rurugby Leave a Comment

There is so much media out there now. So much to consume.

What if you couldn’t turn it all off.

I was reading Andrew Sullivan’s excellent piece about technology almost killing him again. And it made me think of a story idea I have had for a long, long time. A won very recently I decided to make a NanoWrimo idea, “The Off Channel.”

A world where media is free and constantly flowing at you and you can’t turn it off, you can’t turn off the ads unless you pay. People working two or three jobs just to keep paying off debt for what they owe. People who aren’t sleeping. Who are always in front of their technology.

I originally was thinking something like Google Glass, but you can’t throw that away.

Now, I am thinking something more like an implant.

Always showing content, always showing advertising, that you are always able to buy.

I have been trying a very long time to get the momentum in this story going. It needed a hook.

I think I found one, a Donald Trump presidency and a promise that can get him reelected.

Yep, it’s looking more like fiction every day and it two weeks I hope it’s not the truth.

I could see Donald Trump going towards re-election on a promise to give free cable, free ESPN, free internet, free everything. You just have to take an implant. And you can’t turn it off. That isn’t obvious to start with.

Of course, the 1% knows about it, and some spend an extra few thousand to get the implant they can turn off. Some turn if down completely and pay to turn down the privilidge.

Most are happy to get everything for “free.” At $100/month plus often for cable and another $50/month for internet you are talking $1500/year absolutely free. With all of the content, all of the premium channels everything.

And a complete surround sound experience, it’s like it’s directly wired to your brain, because it is.

I’m still trying to figure out how this works, but it sounds like a lot of fun to write.

And yep making the detestable Donald J. Trump a character. I think my hatred of him is worth a few thousand words.

And it all starts on Tuesday, November 1st, planning to give lots of updates on the blog.

FridayReads Returns

October 21, 2016 by rurugby Leave a Comment

So I used to have one of my blog themes a few years ago of FridayReads where I would go through what I have read for the week. Inspired by the #FridayReads hashtag on Twitter. And Nick Hornby’s pieces in a literary magazine and some books.

Books Finished: “Hillbilly Elegy” by J.D. Vance. Very good, I thought it was a great memoir of growing up with a hard life with hillbillies and a successful life. The Marines absolutely helped him. Makes me wonder if we should be teaching basics of finance and hygiene in schools like they do in the Marine Corps. Not many people go from living with an addicted mother with many partners to Yale Law School. And it’s remarkable to me that anyone could graduate Ohio State in 23 months while working. *** 1/2

Books Checked Out: “Ugly Love” by Colleen Hoover (Large Print), it was what they had. I have not started this yet. Became a huge fan of Colleen Hoover with “Slammed” and “Point of Retreat.” Even had my poem “Write Poorly” in “Point of Retreat” which still totally amazes me.

“Confess” by Colleen Hoover, good fun so far, a little less that halfway through, it weird to weird large print but I can get used to it. Considering I do now have reading glasses with a slight +0.5 extra in each eye, I may have to in a decade plus. And the fact you can change font size is a huge advantage with the Kindle. I like how Colleen Hoover has each chapter in the other’s perspective. “Point and Retreat” and “Slammed” will probably always be my favorite Colleen Hoover books. I have book three in that series reserved at the library and came in today. Will probably go in tomorrow for it.

Books bought: “Full Catastrophe Living” by Jon Kabat-Zinn. This was a huge recommendation of Sara Benincasa several times in her books “Real Artists Have Day Jobs” that I am re-reading again. This is about mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) and looks like a lot of book to process in pieces. Definitely not one I would want for Kindle because you may want to dog ear it and come back to things. I opened it up to talk about walking meditation which I am very interested in.

“My Life Cracks Me Up” by Rick Cormier, I absolutely loved his book “Mixed Nuts” about being a psychotherapist. And he is someone I think is pretty awesome. I nicknamed him “Papa Drum” when I went to a couple of his drum circles at the Yarmouth, ME UU church. I haven’t started this yet but I am really looking forward to it. Might read a bit tonight but PBS’s “Hamilton’s America” is on in a few minutes.

Books reading: “Real Artists Have Day Jobs: And Other Awesome Things They Don’t Teach You in School” by Sara Benincasa. I already flew through this in a week and just loved it, here was my Goodreads review. We need more amazing smart, hilarious women like Sara Benincasa making the world better. And she has great points in chapters like: “Make Art Like a Little Kid”, “Stop Apologizing for Everything”, “Wear a Weird Hat”(as you do), and “Ask for Exactly What You Want.” I also like the idea that a female mentor can be good for anyone. Read about half again out of order.

“Unfathomable City: A New Orleans Atlas edited by Rebecca Solnit and Rebecca Snedeker, New Orleans is many, many things. Vast and fascinating books talking about New Orleans from cultural landmarks, oil and fish, how it expanded, music, bananas, sugar and live oaks. The type size is small on this one so I am glad I have glasses. Lots of stuff in the 22 maps included too.

So I did it again. And it was over 500 words again and I didn’t even really read that much this week.

Only finished one book. I made my goal 52 books this year and already have 55 new ones on Goodreads plus some rereads. I love words.

Pokejogging Through Ansonia

October 16, 2016 by rurugby Leave a Comment

I used to be a cross country runner in high school and junior high school. So I really miss running through the woods. In fact one of my first poems and the first one I read at Port Veritas is “I Miss my Cross Country Knees”.

And I’ve been walking more with Pokemon Go.

So today when I jogged a bit. I kept going for a few houses, stopped for a few and jogged again.

It was actually kind of awesome. My legs feel pretty good, my knees aren’t hurting. And I had pauses to get Pokemon and go to PokeStops to get more Pokemon things.

Actually went least twice as far as I expected to. Going into Main Street in Ansonia, not just waiting 5 minutes by the YMCA and turning around. I have 4 Pokestops within a half mile, the Catholic School, Catholic Church (one of them in Ansonia) there is at least one more, the Armory and the YMCA. All basically within a block. There is also 3 downtown another half-mile away I hit down the hill and even tried the Pokemon Gym 3 times. It’s hard to do much there though unless you are a super player (I am level 18 not 30).

And I also noticed some things. I saw people at the new holistic center on Main Street were doing something like yoga at 7pm on a Sunday, definitely a good sign for success. And I saw there was a vegetarian restaurant on Bridge Street near Main Street that must have just opened and is open during the week. I will have to check out both.

Also a coffee shop opened a couple months ago, these are good signs for Ansonia. Maybe a craft beer bar and even a bookshop (something I have considered opening for a while) are coming. I wish I had better credit sometimes. I think a big bookshop in the dead strip mall by the movie theater could work. Maybe could be big enough to have tables for magic and a place to eat some stuff and get coffee. Who knows? I think more geekery is always a good thing. There is certainly the space, I think something like an Ames was there before.

So felt really good to run and hope I can keep doing more. Even if doing it with a water bottle and smartphone in my hand.

I also ran into the other white guy I saw at the Vietnamese Buddhist Temple (services are in Vietnamese) that is around the corner (across from the armory), who was just leaving. Was there much of the day, after services they have lunch and stuff. And I love that it is called the Temple of the Big Heart. I think I have too big a heart for my own good sometimes.

And is awesome to notice both cats are in the room with me. Maybe the Ella Fitzgerald brought them in.

Shorter Days

October 13, 2016 by rurugby Leave a Comment

The sun barely there
Across the Naugatuck Valley.
7pm,
One extra hour of light,
Daylight still saving.
Samhain approaches,
All Hallow’s Eve,
We remember the haunting,
Not the saints.

Remembering our dead,
Remembering our ancestors,
In other cultures,
Not so much in the weird west.
Soon it will be dark at 6,
Soon we will realize we are in the times of the shorter day.

It is beautiful to hear the insects and creatures of the night,
Even with the din of cars.
So nice to be away from it all,
If just for a weekend,
Away from the din of Route 8 freeway not far, and State Street very close.
Away from light pollution, so the stars seem close again.

Dancing with joy around the fire after a ritual. Saying I am, I am, I am before.
I like living close to things,
I like having Pokestops nearby,
The library pretty close,
Although still definitely need a car.
But, part of me craves more silence, less light, more stars.

Our wheels full of horse power, an odd title, make so much din.
The symphony of the insects and crickets, water, and wind is so beautiful and always there
Even if we can’t hear it.

Sleep is Not the Enemy

August 28, 2016 by rurugby Leave a Comment

I’m reading a novel about someone who left everything while manic “Too Bright to Hear, Too Loud to See” by Juliann Garey. It’s very good and the last chapter I read involved being hospitalized in Kenya. After not sleeping for weeks jabbing his hand with a shrimp fork to stop the buzzing.

I have had major mania but in never went that far.

One major mania I had, and the one that wasn’t hospitalized was in my last MBA class at the Oxford Trade Program.

Geneva was great but when I came back to Oxford it got weird especially at a company visit to Birmingham. I do wish though I took the bus to London with the class. It was in August, 2001 and I planned to travel around Europe after.

That didn’t work out. I was pushed out of Oxford to London which thought was an incredibly strange decision. I should have just been hospitalized in Oxford. It was a far more approachable city than being completely alone at Imperial College in the middle of London.

I bought too much stuff, made some odd decisions, lost some stuff at a hostel, it would have been a good time for a private room. And I missed a flight to Edinburgh.

And I didn’t fly out of Rome in early October, I flew back I think to Los Angeles but maybe Newark. I honestly don’t remember.

I do wish I kept my space in Claremont though. It would have been a great place to transition. It’s one of the best places I have ever lived.

I think the mania went down across the ocean, but I don’t really remember. It was fifteen years ago. I do know I was depressed for a very long time. And I slept a lot the next year and didn’t do much. I think it has affected my career since but who knows.

I will say I am very happy I had no new incidents until my dad died in April, 2013 which was also a huge mania where I was hospitalized and have talked more about on the blog in the past.

I also had a smaller mania in April, 2015 that also involved hospitalization. A small mania in December, 1992, I think looking back. And one after graduating college in December, 1997 that was surreal and involved hospitalization.

Maybe I take less risks because I do have major mania. I am happy though I had structure and was able to heal.

Dance, Dance, Dance, Dance, Ya

June 2, 2016 by rurugby Leave a Comment

My friend Lori is at a 90s show with Salt and Pepa, Vanilla Ice, Coolio, Young MC, Tone Loc and a bunch of others tonight in Huntsville, AL. And I have had a great week of dancing.

I got to dance at the opening circle of Rites of Spring and at the opening fire circle.

I got to dance a bit at the Maypole, and have a ribbon break off when I tried to tie it and I wish to move forward.

I got to dance around the Wicker Man on Saturday night before we left the mountain.

I got to dance on Sunday at the wedding and I guess people said I danced well. I got surprised by two women dancing around me aggressively at the wedding which made me smile and gave me a big ego.

I always loved to dance. And always was the geeky dancer in high school.

I guess the groove is in the heart.

And you know what they say Bust a Move, good arcade game too.

And be careful with that Funky Cold Medina.

And you can even Push It good.

And I am even going to include one of my most ridiculous favorites. Gunther’s “Ding Dong Song”, it’s probably not for everyone.

And I have to include the Sir Mix-A-Lot classic “Baby Got Back”. Just classic.

And sometimes you should just Relax.

And remember just dance and have fun!

Unwasted: My Lush Sobriety ***1/2 by Sacha Zimmerman Scoblic

May 8, 2016 by rurugby Leave a Comment

This took me a while to read as I was distracted by library books. I really enjoy the author’s voice and honesty. I enjoy alcohol myself but rarely to get drunk.

Sobriety isn’t easy. I liked how she talked about how she had to get away from people. How drunks would seem like lizard people to her. And how sobriety allowed for deeper connections and a better life.

Also, how having friends and people help you get your through it all is so important.

——————————–

I feel lucky with sobriety. When I first smoked some little cigars that were left over moving a Rite Aid around I didn’t get addicted to smoking.

When I first drank, I drank a little with my parents I didn’t drink to get drunk.

Things like heroin and narcotics have always scared me. I have enjoyed taking codeine briefly but was always careful to only use when it was needed.

And I even need to be more careful with bipolar disorder. Unfortunately substance abuse is very common with bipolar disorder. 60.7 people with bipolar I have substance abuse issues.

But I most definitely feel lucky. Creativity, mental issues and addiction are very, very commonly together.

Kylo Ren (to Michael Jackson’s Ben) — and yes spoilers (big ones)

February 25, 2016 by rurugby Leave a Comment

Yes there are lots of spoilers in this song, in this song
Yes, turn away if that’s not what you’re looking for.
Ben, that’s what my daddy named me,
Ben, the son that he was looking for.

But I ran away from Luke, and found some friends in Ren,
the Knights of Ren,
they said I would be my friends to the end.

Ben, why do you listen to a holograph, holograph,
Snoke isn’t that big it’s just a mask.

Ben, that isn’t actually your granddad, granddad
Ben, that’s just a mask that he had, that he had

Ben, why did you send your dad away, dad away
We thought Han Solo was here to stay, here to stay.

You may think that you are strong,
and the mask makes you look so big,
but there’s something you should know.

Ben, you think your name is Kylo Ren,
but you are still a sad boy named Ben.

You may think we you don’t need Han,
but we think that you are wrong.

Kylo Ren, you are just a sad, scared boy, sad, scared boy.
Rey, almost made it that you were gone to stay.

She is only getting stronger and something tell you,
wish that we stayed with your friends.

With your friends,
Kylo Ren,
Kylo Ren.

Actual lyrics:

Ben, the two of us need look no more,
We both found what we were looking for.
With a friend to call my own,
I’ll never be alone, and you, my friend, will see,
You’ve got a friend in me.

Ben, you’re always running here and there,
You feel you’re not wanted anywhere.
If you ever look behind and don’t like what you find
There’s something you should know, you’ve got a place to go.
I used to say I and me, now it’s us, now it’s we.
I used to say I and me, now it’s us, now it’s we.
Ben most people would turn you away;
I don’t listen to a word they say.
They don’t see you as I do;
I wish they would try to’
I’m sure they’d think again if they had a friend like Ben,
A friend like Ben
(Like Ben)
Like Ben

Commercials

February 18, 2016 by rurugby Leave a Comment

Dumb noise.

Buy shit.

Buy more shit.

Watch crap.

Watch some more crap.

They are occasionally clever.

If they weren’t so effective, there wouldn’t be so many.

We have so much stuff.

Due to television, the drug of the nation.
Breeding ignorance and sending radiation.

The last two lines from the Disposable Heroes of Hiphopcracy brilliant song “Television: The Drug of the Nation.” Here are the full lyrics.

For We Have Been Touched by Magic

October 5, 2014 by rurugby 1 Comment

There is a line in a chant we using at the closing circle at Rites of Spring, a pagan gathering we go to every Memorial Day weekend in the Berkshires called Rites of Spring. “For we have been touched by magic, and the magic will make us whole.”

Maine is beautiful, it’s a special place. Portland is a magical city.

But since we have moved to North State Street in Ansonia, CT the place ahs been touched by magic. When my wife saw the two benches in the gravel she immediately thought it was a Fairie garden. It seemed touched with something special.

The song of crickets at night makes my soul happy. All of the beautiful rocks. The old trees. The old houses. It’s beautiful.

The amazing view across the valley, special. Seeing insects lit up by the late evening sun looking like little fairies.

Bees loving the wildflowers, playing with the pollen and being happy.

The world would be a better place if we planted gardens over grass. Better for the local wildlife. Prettier. Food during the harvest. Canning. Old ways.

Also less gas used, less sameness, less blah.

Not sure when planned communities in beige with bizarre homeowners association rules and sameness became desirable.

Feeling touched by magic in the local forest. I am a forest person.

Going from the beautiful Ansonia Nature Center and exploring off trail into the Naugatuck State Forest. Getting lost, feeling the spirit of the trees, stumps and old rocks. Feeling the energy of the land. I am feeling deeply connected here.

Who know I may have some roots here. My ancestors in America go back a long way, a lot fo them in the 17th and 18th Century. I know I have some roots in Mexico, Maine wondering if I have roots in the valley.

This area built things. Rivers like the Naugatuck, and the Presumpcot which goes through Westbrook, Maine and was the most dammed river in the US per mile not long ago, were industrial corridors. The United States, used to build things. Ansonia was a copper center, Waterbury a center of Brass, Westbrook a paper town, tires made in the Valley working people.

Beautiful old mills, sometimes destroyed, sometimes converted to beautiful use. Like the North Dam Mill in Biddeford, ME and the Dana Warp Mill in Westbrook, Maine.

I heard a rumor while fixing my car that the huge copper mills in Ansonia are due to be torn down too. I hope they are made into a park. I would rather they were converted into something cool and beautiful. I need to ride the Metro North to Waterbury and go through them before they go.

I have heard everyone in Derby and Ansonia knows each other. I need to get into those circles and I think I will be a lot happier. It’s a matter of time.

I do like the neighborhood and it’s a special place. And touched by magic.

eddie

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